Family Dynamics

I've just gotten off the phone with my middle brother. He was involved in a car accident last weekend, only he didn't bother to tell anybody in the family until they found out through other channels. It was a serious enough accident that he was airlifted to a regional medical hospital because of head injuries. He seems to be okay, but he has fractures in his facial bones that go up through his sinus and forehead. He has an appointment with a plastic surgeon on Monday to look at his face.

Why didn't he contact anybody in the family? Because he was afraid of my parents' reaction. My brother & his wife are going through a tough time right now as a family and all kinds of emotions, accusations, and legal things (not related to my parents) are happening because of this. Because of this, relations are strained on all sides. Also, my middle brother has a history of strained relations with my mother.

My feeling on this : Regardless how strained your relationship is with your parents, if you are involved in a serious accident that requires you to be hospitalized, you should at least notify them. Because no matter what they DO love you. And care what happens to you. Be decent and contact them. Don't wait for them to hear an exaggerated story from a friend of a friend of a friend.

And while I'm on the topic of family dynamics, I have a story to tell about my oldest brother's son Johnathan. The one who has just turned six and I treat and love as nearly being my own son.

See, Johnathan's daddy and mom are going through a rough patch financially too. And they're working it out. For awhile though, it looked like things were getting really hairy. So, in a birthday card to my brother, I offered to let Johnathan come and live with me if things got really bad. Now, I know I live across an ocean from them and it would be difficult to implement this offer. However, it was completely sincere. I haven't heard one word from my brother about the birthday card, small gift that came with it, or my offer since then.

Then, this week, as I was on the phone wishing Johnathan a Happy Birthday, HE mentions my offer. "Aunt Anna? You know how you wrote Daddy in his card how I could come live with you? Well, mommy says that I can't. Sorry."

Wha? Huh? Who mentions things like this with a five year old? In what context could this POSSIBLY come up? I'm baffled.
Posted by Jinglelady at September 20, 2003 10:20 PM | Previous Blog | TrackBack